20051202

THE NEWS STOOPER So there we are watching good ol reliable CNN……….well it was worth a shot to fool you but you are all too smart for that and know its not reliable. A continuous replaying report came on how multiple government facilities and bases were attacked in downtown Ramadi, Iraq on Thursday. They continued to show video of masked men shooting down a street (which should be criminal, if a US reporter cooperates with and films the enemy at their location and aides them in any way, he should be tried for treason and executed in public if found guilty). But wait a second, the report and video don’t match, but who back in the states would notice so lets role this footage and fool the sheep who follow our every word. They are too stupid and they won’t know. Its video of anywhere but Ramadi. How do we know?? oh because we were downtown Ramadi when all the “attacks� were suppose to have happened. The markets were active and small children were out and about even yes, around the US bases. No bases were attacked and nothing was out of the ordinary as the BIG time news station was reporting. But, they weren’t alone. Yahoo reports like this one with little to no meat to the story was also released but now has been altered to read different as they know they were taken to the cleaners. “Insurgents attack government facilities� what a wad of monkey crap!! America if you didn’t believe us in the past, this should do nothing but reinforce how we are saying that the enemy is trying to get to you all at home to go south and demand us to come home before the job is done and that the media is soooo off mark. This just proves we are making huge gains here. Why? Because the real blind sheep…….the big time news agencies bought the trick, line and sinker from the terrorists. They fell for the oldest trick in the book, taking news tips from the enemy and paying them big cash to allow camera men to tag along with them. Yea great idea because a camera might look like an RPG to a Marine far enough away. It’s a clever technique that the US invented. Counter pysops is one way to buy out “reliable� sources to submit story’s to the press. This is now proof of how desperate the big time news agencies are for bad gauge on the US campaign in Iraq. They have no news so they pay for whatever may come down the line. Lowering their contacts and standards they knowingly purchase news reports and film events from the enemy. Their fat ass reporters that never leave Baghdad buildings sit in a nice protected building and never come where the fighting is. But when its time for their 45 seconds of fame interview on Clown Network News they walk outside and record a breaking news update. Ever notice how clean those reporters are? You don’t stay clean running around while bullets are being fired at you. When they do come out for more than a day they hide themselves in hummers and under their ill fitting helmets that slope down and cover their eyes, that is if they don’t have it on backwards, that’s a sight to see (I got to get a picture of one of them for ya). I swear they must eat big bowls of dumbass before they depart so that they can ask the most retarded questions to troops. They sound like Jane Freaking Fonda herself when they open their mouths. There are a couple reporters that “live� with the troops to get stories, not many but Im quickly loosing confidence in their ability as well since MSNNBC ran the above story as “Breaking News� and then had some cluster screwball that was an “embedded reporter� (traitor) living with the troops, talking about how Iraqi forces arnt even materializing. Holy BAT shit Robin, Im in the wrong work. I should start a news agency called “No shit news� and when I don’t have anything to report I would print “I no shit don’t have a damn thing to say� at least it would be honest news unlike these walking frauds. But nope these brainiacks are vomiting so much crap faster than they can validate it. Seems to be a reoccurring event huh? I can just hear two bonehead reporters talking now….. “hey bob I hear there were attacks in Ramdi today, really I didn’t get up until noon so Im not sure and you know we haven’t had a story in awhile so let me call a guy I met last week carrying an AK47. He gave me this Iraqi cell phone and he will give us the word on the street. You know we need to send some material back to the clown network so our ass’s can continue to grow while we are out here playing Nintendo.� Hand me that box of Twinkies would ya? Great I’ll bring my camera and get some footage of them shooting at American troops! Great idea you’re a swell guy bob�. Music from the “Leave it to Beaver� TV show begins to play in the background. Its now so very obvious that the president has just landed a size twelve Monkey Stomp on the insurgents and wayward sheep’s chest. With his release of the Iraq Plan the media is dumbfounded and the ones that can read are now scratching their fat asses and saying hummmm sounds like a good plan. Well no kidding Dick Tracy, wake up get on a weight loss plan and smell the freaking roses. If you haven’t read the plan do so by clicking here. I’m going to print off hard copies and mail them to all of the news agencies in huge romper room style print just so they cant say they don’t know what we are talking about. They can have nap time after they read it. Apparently, now every time you see a news story, your going to have to ask yourself. “I wonder what really happened� because as you already know, they have lost their most valuable characteristic, credibility and this proves your continuously getting news from the enemy! We got small arms fire just off the base, gotta go help Marines that are making real news.…….if you see any reporters tell them to drop the Twinkies, follow the cigar smoke and head this way! Semper- Capt B out………. COMBAT UPDATE (The below had nothing to do with the proclaimed reports that never happened above) CAMP FALLUJAH, Iraq — Ten Marines from Regimental Combat Team 8, 2nd Marine Division, II Marine Expeditionary Force (Forward), were killed in action by an improvised explosive device while conducting a foot patrol outside of Fallujah, Dec. 1. The patrol was attacked with an IED fashioned from several large artillery shells. Eleven Marines were wounded in the incident; of those, seven have returned to duty. Marines from RCT-8 continue to conduct counterinsurgency operations throughout Fallujah and surrounding areas to provide a secure environment for the national elections, Dec.15 The names of the deceased are being withheld pending notification of next of kin and release by the Department of Defense. Pray for their families........
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Comments:
Keep it up Captain, a lot of us are proud of you guys!
 
Keep up the good work Cap. Many of us back home are not sheeples and those of us who arent are like you and despise the Communist News Network. They have no credibility in my book. Good Work Marine and May God Bless You.

Boilerdawg
 
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